Saturday, August 30, 2008

These are truly the last days. (Albeit not the one's I expected)

Well, I have said it before and I'll say it again, "I am leaving soon!" It has been, for lack of a better word, interesting for me these last couple of days seeing as I am the last of the departing exchange students to leave. There are already at least 4 or 5 inbound exchange students here in Ashland that I know of and they are all doing very well. My friend Alex has been in Ecuador for a week already and is nothing less than explosively ecstatic about his experience (if you know Alex you know what I mean). I can only hope my first week in Portugal will compare to his seemingly flawless time. I am sure it will! It seems as though everyone is gearing up for something now. My friends and brother have been attending the Fresh Start program through the High School. My brother is attending as a first timer (incoming Freshman hence "Fresh Start") and my friends as upstanding role-models/counselors/helpers/friends etc. The rest of my comrades who are not taking part in this program seem to be even more busy with things such as sports, (water polo players and footballers are having two-a-days) end of the summer vacations (Wilderness Charter School Backpacking trip), or summer homework; which should have been finished by now but, as the rule of the stereo-types go, procrastinating teens will always put off summer homework until the last minute. As you may see this lack of companionship/time consuming tasks has/have lead me to feel somewhat abandoned and utterly alone. Save my beloved dog Rocket who lies sleeping at my feet as I stare at screens for hours upon end. Thus I have been filling my spare time with online gaming, t.v. and other brain-numbing anti-everything activities. Of course I am being somewhat facetious but (sadly) I find it difficult to really express myself otherwise. I have been keeping fairly busy with packing, working out itineraries and the likes that deal with my departure/exchange but as the saying goes "If we don't have large time consuming tasks to occupy us, our lives get filled with things that are meaningless, that are momentarily distracting but have no exalting possibilities." I edited that a little! ;)
On a lighter note I have said goodbye to most all my friends and am happily preparing for my time abroad. I am really very excited to be leaving so soon and there is nothing in the world that can crash my soaring spirits. The last few days have been just an end of the summer blues period where saying goodbye and lounging around/lack of motivation and activities have left me feeling frustrated, anxious and a little depressed; it's not how I expected to go out but there's proof of why we should hold no expectations, and I will take it as another life experience. My advice to you if you ever feel this way is to just get out; which I am about to do now. Learn from the past, live in the moment and be mindful of the future. My perception of time right now feels so skewed. The past seems so far away, as does the future and the present seems to drag along. Of course there is nothing and no-one to blame for this, not even myself this time, it is just another mystery that lies deep in the dark depths of human thought, emotion, and above all existence. I am excited to start traveling with my Dad. We leave Ashland on Monday, go to San Fransisco, stay a night there, fly to New York Tuesday, I stay there for Two nights for the departure orientation then fly to Lisbon/Lisboa in Portuguese on Thursday and I won't arrive there until Friday. Then I go to another orientation for inbound students until the 7th when I meet my host family and leave with them to my new home! After that it's school, adventure, experience and fun!

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